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Why Mindfulness is NOT (Just) Meditation

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Mindfulness is seeing yourself in the moment for who you are and tracking areas you’d like to improve. It’s focusing on the present and letting go of the things that don’t serve you. Mindfulness allows us to get more done, accomplish more goals, and live a more healthy life.

The Institute of Science, Technology and Public Policy at Maharishi University has reported that “Leading medical experts estimate that 90% of disease is caused or complicated by stress.”

That is an astounding number. Stress is an epidemic in our country. In a study conducted by the American Psychological Association, 77% of respondents reported “regularly experiencing physical symptoms caused by stress” and 73% “psychological symptoms.”

Are you one of the three-fourths that are plagued with regular stress, overwhelm, exhaustion, burnout or extreme frustration?

I am. Sometimes it feels like an uphill battle that can never be won, but I promise- you do have tools at your disposal. One of my favorites is: Mindfulness.

Now before you start thinking of yoga poses and breathing techniques, let me stop you. Those things CAN be a PART of mindfulness, but it’s not the entire concept. Mindful living is so much more than that!

WHAT IS MINDFULNESS ANYWAY?

I love the definition given at mindful.org: “Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us.”

Does that definition say anything about yoga or meditation? It certainly doesn’t!

Mindfulness is an ability that everyone already possesses. It’s a state of mind. It’s something you can do anywhere, anytime. You can develop and evaluate your mindfulness in different ways (which is what I like to teach about here at V&B), but it’s not a “skill” that only some possess.

Put most simply, mindFULness is really just the opposite of mindLESSness. Having a mind FULL of things that will make you a better person and lead you to a more satisfying life, instead of allowing yourself to make “mindLESS” choices on a whim.

I like to think of it as awareness. Being aware of the things around you so you can act accordingly. Paying attention to the moment at hand. Being intentional with your time, your actions and your thoughts.

It’s about making specific choices based on positive life goals, instead of letting life control your path.

It’s about constantly working toward those goals, while still being kind to your spirit and giving yourself lots of grace. It’s about loving yourself for who you are, but knowing your great potential and pushing yourself to be better. It’s about recognizing the positives you have to offer, but knowing you can be So Much More!

Focus on the Present

We have a tendency to focus on things that occurred in the past and anticipating too strongly the things that might happen. Though joyful memories and excitement for what is to come can be great things, allowing them to take the majority of our mindspace is detrimental to our progress.

Instead, it is far more healthy to focus on the things of the present. Mindfulness is paying attention to what’s happening right now: your actions, your thoughts, your environment. It’s not letting your mind get carried away with thoughts of the past or worries from the present. It’s letting go of anything that doesn’t serve your current goals and refocusing your mind if you get off track. It keeps you grounded in the here and now.

Mindfulness is Internal

Mindfulness focuses on the inner self, rather than the outer.

Being mindful allows us to see into our spirits- to the place that nobody else gets to see. It helps us to dig deep into our soul and pull out the aspects of ourselves that really define us. It’s letting go of how the world sees you, and allowing you to see yourself for who you really are. Your true self.

Being mindful has been huge in my development of self-confidence and self-esteem. It helps me to see that it doesn’t matter what people think if I know the real truth.

Mindfulness is freeing. It’s letting go of what doesn’t serve you and allowing yourself to focus on what does.

Benefits of Being Mindfulness

Mindfulness is not just a “fad” or “new-age trend.”

Incorporating mindfulness into your life has many tangible health benefits, including:

  • Decreased stress and increased capacity to work through life’s challenges
  • Increased clarity, attention, and brain function
  • Lowered anxiety and depression
  • Improved general well-being

Mindful.org explains: “When we’re mindful, we reduce stress, enhance performance, gain insight and awareness through observing our own mind, and increase our attention to other’s well-being.”

It’s so easy to get caught up in the struggles and trials of our everyday lives and miss the wonderfully good things that happen around us. Constant pessimism is like poison to our spirits, but stopping to see the positives can provide us with much needed positive energy, which can be incredibly uplifting.

The beauty of true mindfulness is in the huge impact it brings to our spirits. Being fully aware of your mind and your surroundings can help you to see the good within life’s challenges.

It doesn’t erase the difficulties of life; it simply allows us to work through them calmly and realistically, instead of with fear and negativity. It turns them into opportunities for growth and progression, rather than tragedies and misfortunes.

This is quite a different view of mindfulness than merely relying on meditation and yoga, am I right?

Mindfulness is a Choice

“But how can I just ignore all the bad things in my life?”

You can’t. And doing so wouldn’t be healthy anyway. Those negatives influence who you are. They are a part of your past, but they don’t have to define you.

You get to decide what you focus on. You get to choose what you let matter. It’s your choice where you put your energies.

How do I Practice Mindfulness?

Let me be clear: “being mindful” and “practicing mindfulness” aren’t entirely the same.

While, as stated above, you can be mindful anytime, anywhere, “practicing” mindfulness is an intentional action that you must set aside time for.

It can look different for everyone, but for me, I find that spending time each day (usually at night) physically tracking my mindset is very beneficial. This is the procedure I facilitate at Vibrance & Bliss.

In a specific place in my planner I track things like:

  • my moods
  • gratitude
  • water intake (and other health concerns)
  • goals & progress: daily, weekly etc…
  • intentional routines & schedule
  • choosing the right tasks
  • small (or large!) daily wins, improvements, achievements & successes
  • memories
  • positive choices
  • future goals & improvements
  • daily evaluation

It Can Be A Challenge

So I think at this point we agree that being mindful has its benefits, and we have a basic outline of what it entails and how to put it into practice. But does that mean it’s easy?

Hardly!

Living mindfully can be a very difficult thing to do.

Yes, it is relatively simple in theory, but living mindfully requires you to address some things in your life that may be uncomfortable or upsetting.

Though it’s easier to ignore the challenges we face, it is much healthier to deal with and work through them. That’s where mindfulness can help. It takes you out of the negative headspace and helps you see what positives you can draw from the experience.

How do I stay motivated?

So how do you keep on track if you’re feeling the pressure and challenge of mindfully evaluating your day each night?

Just like any new habit or routine, it will take practice and consistency. Do it every night if possible. If you miss a day, no big deal. Just pick up again and keep going.

But always, ALWAYS be kind to yourself. That’s really the most important part. I like to think of it as “giving myself grace.” Don’t beat yourself up over a missed day or two. You’ll zap away all your motivation to keep trying.

Instead, cut yourself some slack. Don’t give up. Realize that perfection will not ever be possible.

Try changing your routine. Perhaps see if a mindfulness app can help your motivation levels. Whatever you can do to improve your consistency, the better you’ll be. If you can see you’re making progress, you’re more likely to stick to your budding routine.

How Positivity Influences Productivity

So why does all this matter? How does being “mindful” help me to get more done?

Have you ever sat down to complete a task and find yourself flooded by memories of a past negative experience? Or maybe you start to worry about an upcoming deadline you’re not sure you’ll hit?

If you’re anything like me, these thoughts probably continue running through your mind and keep you from completing the task, and twenty minutes later you’re feeling frustrated and defeated and your task is at the exact same place you left it.

Sound familiar? Trust me, I’ve been there.

The human mind loves to wander. We are easily distracted, and have a habit of allowing our minds to run over the place. This is mindlessness. You may be thinking of something, but it is certainly not what is going to further your present goals.

This is where mindfulness really shines! Constant and intentional consideration of your desired goals helps keep you on track as your mind naturally wanders.

Mindfulness IS productivity! It is the driving force that helps you get things done!

It allows you to step away from the negative thoughts that destroy your motivation and focus, and into a peaceful place where you feel positive and energized.

We are so focused on accomplishing our goals and tending to our to-dos, taking the time to contemplate life’s intangibles doesn’t always seem practical. But recognizing the boon to productivity that mindfulness provides tells us it’s well worth the “sacrifice.”

Quick Review

What Mindfulness IS:

  • Staying in the moment
  • Recognizing yourself for who you are, but not being content to staying there
  • Addressing the negatives but choosing to focus on the positives
  • Tracking areas of desired improvement

What it’s NOT:

  • Breathing exercises
  • Yoga poses
  • Ignoring what’s going on around us
  • Obsessing about the past or worrying about the future

HOW DO I DO IT?

Daily tracking the aspects of your life you’d like to see more positive results in: your gratitude, moods, health, energy, goals, routines or

HOW IS MINDFULNESS DIFFERENT FROM MEDITATION?

Whereas meditation is something you DO, mindfulness is a state of mind- an awareness that your life is made up of more than the events in your life. Being mindful is a constant choice, and though meditation can be a great avenue to improve your mental health, it does not define mindfulness.

Why does all this matter? What’s the point?

Mindfulness:

  • Increases your focus
  • Improves motivation
  • Stimulates work ethic

Simply put, mindfulness allows us to get more done, accomplish more goals, and live a more healthy life. And who doesn’t want that?   

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  3. Join the Discussion: What does mindfulness mean to you? Leave a comment below!

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Healing through Divorce

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Divorce was something I never thought I'd recover from. This is my journey of healing from the heartbreak I thought would defeat me, and what I've learned along the way.

Six and a half years ago I married a man who ruled my world. Though I wasn’t so naive to think everything would be perfect, the goodness in him was evident, and I knew he was the right choice for me. We had joint dreams, beliefs and interests, and with him I felt more joy than I had ever before.

I remember through our engagement when we would think and discuss our future we would say “we’re going to be awesome!” And we were! For a time.

But life got difficult and communication changed. We stopped being partners and became roommates. We still had great experiences and good times, but they were coming less often.

When I signed the divorce papers not too long ago, the man who had once been my best friend and held all my dreams for the future, was now little more than a stranger. A stranger with many years of history and baggage between us. I no longer recognized him.

But my purposes for writing about my divorce is not to dwell in the negative of what happened. Quite the opposite, I want to share some of the incredible thoughts and experiences I’ve had since.  

Though I didn’t ask for this trial and wouldn’t wish it on anyone, I can’t say that every aspect of it has been horrible. Ironically enough, in some ways I’m also happier than I’ve been for a long time. I know without a doubt that I’ve been blessed throughout all of this.

This process of healing & letting go has given me new realizations about myself and unexpected life benefits I’d never have anticipated.

Realizations:

I am stronger than I thought.

I’ve never seen myself as a strong person. Maybe it’s my lack of confidence or my tendency to be too hard on myself. Either way, though the divorce came quickly and unexpectedly, I’d pondered occasionally what I’d do if we did separate.

Let me tell you- my thoughts weren’t filled with rainbows and unicorns.

I didn’t think I’d survive it.

And if I’m being honest, I stayed in a difficult relationship partly because I didn’t want to try to survive it. (There were many other reasons I stayed, but I’ll address those at a later time.)

I didn’t believe in my ability to work through the difficulties and find my sunshine again.

But you know what I’ve learned? I am a lot stronger than I gave myself credit for!

I’m learning that I CAN do this! I WILL get through this!

Everyday that passes is another testament that I am surviving what I’d thought would completely destroy me.

I’m not saying it’s easy, but I’m getting through it. Better than I ever thought I would. And next time I’m faced with something difficult? Maybe I’ll trust my inner strength just a little more.

My faith in God is more sure.

I’ve never been the ultra-spiritual one in my family, but I’ve always held a knowledge of  God and my Savior. It was more of a quiet faith- I knew the truth in my heart and followed the principles I knew to be true, but I never felt the burning desire to dive head-first into His teachings.

When the “writing on the wall” became more and more apparent, and though I hoped and prayed it wouldn’t happen, I wondered what I’d do if it did. Would I abandon the God who seemingly abandoned me? Would I grow more lazy in my worship and tell myself He is to blame?

I didn’t know. I’ve never really been very good at imagining the hypotheticals. But when I was being honest with myself, I feared that would be my reaction.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered the opposite. When I found my marriage, the thing that I treasured and held so dear, crumbling at my feet, I was devastated. I was frustrated and confused and hurt. God was supposed to protect me from this pain, wasn’t He?  This is the time I would’ve thought I’d be lashing out in anger and frustration.

But you know what happened? I felt my Father in Heaven wrap his loving arms around me, and I felt not only safe, but empowered.

I could do this! I would survive this! I would get through this! And not only would I eventually return to who I used to be, but I’d come out on top! I’d be better than I started!

That feeling was life changing for me. I didn’t need to lash out, because He was right there with me. So though things didn’t work out for me the way I wanted, I know He has a plan for me that right now I don’t understand. And for now, that’s enough.

The “Silver Lining”:

Let me preface this section by saying that I didn’t want this divorce. This is not something I sought out or wished for.

But since I’m choosing to try and see the good instead of focusing on the bad (a feat for me, trust me!) when I sit down and think about it, there are some definite blessings I have received as a result of this change in my life.

I won’t list them all, because there have been many. I can definitely see God’s guiding hand in my life. But here are a few I feel some of you can relate to.

Relationship with God

Before the divorce, I’d been lazy in my worship and in my study. I didn’t always make the choices I knew were right, and I let myself be ruled by complacency rather than spirituality.

This has given me a new drive to move forward with what I know to be true and right. I no longer believe that I can skate by with minimal effort. That’s no longer enough for me. I’m grateful for this “kick in the pants” so to speak, though yes, I do wish I’d have been open & willing to listen another way.

Closer to Family

I’ve always been a family-oriented girl. I love my family. I am beyond blessed to have been born into one that is supportive and loving. I see evidence all around me of those who have not been so lucky, and it saddens me.

It was extremely difficult when I moved away from these people I loved so deeply. I felt that at the time it was right for my family, and I still believe it was. But it was hard. It was difficult to miss the everyday events, my niece and nephew’s play, the day my nephews won their little league championship. I missed a lot, but I knew I was building a future for my family, and that was enough.

After the divorce I moved back home. I can’t tell you how good it feels to be back! To be so close to the people that I know love and care for me. To be showered with affection and appreciation and positivity. It has been a boon to my soul, and I am immensely grateful.

I don’t know how I ever left them, and I don’t know if I’d do it again. But for now, I’m so blessed and treasure the time with them.

Focus on Me

This one is a little good along with a little not-so good. It’s necessary for me, but a constant reminder of the person missing from my life.

Being on my own again after being a girlfriend/fiance/wife for 7 years has given me a chance to focus on nobody but myself. Not in a selfish way, but in a “strengthen myself” kind of way.

I’ve needed this for so long, but the day-to-day living always seemed to come first. Focusing on my job, taking care of the house, meeting his needs.

I’m not saying I never had the opportunity to take the time to re-evaluate my own needs, but I certainly never took it. Other things always seemed more important, more pressing.

Now? I’m taking it. I’m allowing myself to take the time I need to really discover who I am now. Because I’ve changed a lot in the last 7 years, and I need to address that.

It’s been beautiful to re-discover some forgotten strengths, to gracefully take note of the things I need to work on. Rather than beating myself up, I am loving myself for who I am right now, as well making plans to become the person I want to be.

How I’m Healing

Divorce quite often comes with a lot of pain, no matter what circumstances preclude it. Mine sure did. And I’ve learned that without coming to terms with and working through that pain, I’ll never be ready for what comes next.

So I’m working on healing! How do I go about it?

Family

As you can probably imagine from reading above, spending a lot of quality time has been more beneficial than I ever could have hoped for. Being fully surrounded by love on a constant basis has given my soul much needed nourishment.

It helps to have people in my life who have been where I am and can help me process what I’m going through. I can talk through my emotions and they are validated and acknowledged.

I’m staying with my sister right now, and being in her home has been inspiring. The way she (and her husband) love and teach their children is inspiring. The sweet good morning and night hugs from my nieces and nephews fill my heart.

God

I’ve mentioned a few things above about how increasing my spirituality has helped me heal, but I’ll tell you another.

I’ve allowed myself to forgive and have hope. Not completely mind you. I’m human! But I’m working on it. I’m not filled with contempt and hate the way I’d worried I would be. I’m not destroyed with depression and worry.

I know these feelings of peace and love are coming from above, because I’m not strong enough to have them myself!

Self care & lots of grace

I am normally so hard on myself. I beat myself up over the things I don’t do, the qualities I don’t have and the mistakes I make. Normally.

But right now? I’m trying very hard not to. And surprisingly, I’m mostly succeeding. It’s strange though- at a time when I thought I’d be the most difficult of all, I’ve felt a peace and direction I’ve never had.

I am where I need to be. It’s hard to accept right now, when my life is in such disarray. But this is where I need to be to receive the blessings and life that is coming.

So right now? I’m giving myself lots of grace. Forgiving myself when it’s needed and allowing me to take things slow. For my normally quick/get things done personalty, this is really something! Slow isn’t how I work. But right now?

Let me give you an example. I’m finding it hard to focus on a single task right now. My thoughts start drifting and memories take over, sadness/grief/loss sets in and the task goes forgotten. Normally I’d get so frustrated with myself for “wasting time.” But really? Who can blame me? So I give myself grace (my version of a personal hug to myself) and pick the task back up how and when I can.

I’ll get there eventually. I’ll return to my ultra-productive get-things-done self. Mostly. But honestly? I wouldn’t mind if this new “forgive myself” attitude remained.

Keeping Busy & building ministry

I’ve spoken a ton about myself and my own experiences– but this section is about you!

I’ve been wanting to build and grow this blog for a long time, and even took some major steps to get it going before the news hit. But ever since it has, I’ve felt a major shift in what I want to share with you.

I want to be less focused on getting “more” done, and more focused on helping you determine what’s most important in your life. It does no good to get 30 things checked off your list if none of them are helping you be the person you want to be. I want you to be intentional about what you’re choosing to spend your time on, rather than just solving whatever emergency happens to come up.

Why does this matter? Because this divorce has taught me that “someday” may never come. There’s a lot we said we would “someday” do or change or fix. And our “someday”, as a couple, will never come. And I’m grieving that, but I don’t want your someday to never come. I want you to accomplish the things you want for yourself. I want you to focus your very limited time on the things that matter.

So what does this have to do with how I’m healing? Everything, actually. A year ago I didn’t know my purpose. I had no direction. My life was stagnant. I wasn’t progressing.

Now? I know this is where I need to be. So I’m building my ministry. I’m going to share with you the things I’ve experienced, what I’ve learned and what has helped me grow. I’m hoping that by doing this I can help you avoid some possible pitfalls and give you some tools that have helped me along the way.  And that’s healing to me? Extremely so.

I hope you don’t mind me being so open and honest with you. That’s my goal: to be as transparent as possible so that you can see how what I’ve experienced has influenced and changed me into who I am. Because that’s how I can help you. I’ve lived through things that have taught me how to value my time, how to organize my life in an intentional way, and how to respect and care for myself- because really, I’m the only me I’ve got!

It’s been an (almost) unbearably difficult few months, but each day that passes feels like a victory. One more day. I survived one more day. And I’ll keep surviving, each day after that. Because I’m not alone, I have more strength than I ever thought, and I have a ministry to fulfill!

How about you? How do you look for the good, even when it’s difficult? Share in the comments below.

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Life’s Golden Ticket – Review

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Book Review for "Life's Golden Ticket" by Brendon Burchard. Fabulous story about forgiveness, self-empowerment and reinvention. Post includes a free printable and an offer for a downloadable workbook to guide your reading.

Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase using one of my links, I get a small compensation at no additional cost to you. Thank you for supporting Vibrance & Bliss.

I’ve been following Brendon for a good while now, but this is the book that started it for me. I saw a Facebook ad for his book, immediately ordered it, and let it sit on my shelf for a couple of years. I don’t know why exactly- life got in the way? Other priorities taking precedent? In any case, with my new resolve to read more great books, I knew I wanted this book at the top of my list.

I’m so glad I ordered and dove into this book! Brendon has such a passion for helping people. I see it in every course of his I take, every workshop and training. He truly gets fired up every time he speaks about building a positive life. If you haven’t signed up for his updates, you won’t be disappointed.

“Life’s Golden Ticket” is an allegory about a man trying to come to terms with his past, forgive and be forgiven, and make a fresh start. I don’t want to give away any of the story, but here are some of the lessons I pulled from the book. (There are many!)

1. Society’s Lie

Do not fall prey to, or let go of what Brendon calls “Society’s Lie.” As the main character is told on pages 34-36:

“You have been lured into a lie that has controlled your mind and contaminated your life, a lie that has prevented you from being your best, from taking risks, from having the confidence and strength needed to seize the life that you’ve always wanted. It has mesmerized you into believing that you are not good enough and that there is something wrong with you. It has made you secretly feel inadequate, ugly, weak, slow, small, useless, and helpless for far too long. It has been neutralizing your innate desire to stand up for yourself and become the person you were destined to be.”

I absolutely love this passage. Does this sound at all familiar to you? Are you guilty of allowing this horrible lie seep into your thoughts and cause you do doubt your potential? I know I am. Self-doubt is a mean monster, and it doesn’t fight fair. I love how vividly Brendon expresses the damage it does to our spirit, as well as providing us with something way more powerful than this vile lie. (I’m not going to tell you what it is- you have to read the book!) It’s something we’re all able to obtain, and it’s super effective in overpowering “society’s lie.”

In this section of the book, Brendon also gives three steps to defeating the self-doubt. Simple things that although aren’t always easy, are incredibly helpful in putting you on the path to the great things you’re capable of.

2. Elephant’s Leash

In the story, an analogy is drawn between us and one of the most massive creatures on earth: an elephant. It is explained how from a very young age, elephants are tied by rope to a pole. They struggle, at first, to get free. But soon they come to terms with the fact that they’re just too weak to break the rope. They stop struggling. They give in. As they grow stronger, they never question that rope again. Even as adults, they never stop to realize they have the potential to snap that rope in two with almost no effort. They have resigned themselves to their fate: no question. No trial. No reward.

How many of us are like that? Resigned to our “fate” of accomplishing little, because someone told us we couldn’t? Or because we tried once and failed. Why do we give up? Why do we stop trying?

It is truly a beautiful story, and Brendon’s rendition is so powerfully worded you really should read it first-hand. (If you own or buy the book, it’s on p. 82-84)

3. Positive VS. Negative

This seems to be a major theme running throughout the book. It’s discussed several ways in different places, in different ways. This is something I’ve personally struggled with: keeping a positive outlook. As one character in the book says to another:

“We’re drowning here. In despair, in our own pools of pessimism.” (p.6)

And aren’t we? Isn’t there so much negative around us? On the news? In our communities? In the media?

But wait- that kind of thinking is exactly the kind of negative focus Brendon warns us again in Golden Ticket. Because really, though yes, there is a lot of bad, there is also a lot of good! It’s all around us! But do we focus on that? I, personally, struggle with that quite often. It’s easy to see the bad and blame it for all our troubles. But how often do we express gratitude for the good that also surrounds us?

4. Miracle Makers

I loved this section so much. I can’t express to you how strongly this section of the book touched me.

“Many of us live our lives desperately seeking to draw attention to ourselves. We live our lives to be noticed, accepted, and adored. We live our lives as if we were in the center ring [of a circus], as if the world should sit around applauding our every move. But there are a small number of people in this world who live their lives to make others smile, to remind others of the magic and hope in the world, to help them discover the possibilities that live within them. Whenever people like this end up in the spotlight, they use their moment to help others through the dark.” (p. 178)

Doesn’t that just give you goosebumps? It did for me! Brendon goes on to call these people “Miracle Makers”, because they make miracles happen for those around them. He explains that these select few have dedicated their lives to making life better for the people they associate with. How beautiful is that?

While reading this section, you can’t help but ask yourself: What am I adding to the world around me? Am I only “taking” from the world? Or what is my contribution? Can I give more? How can I add to the lives of the people in my life?

Powerful stuff right there…

5. Don’t Settle: Progress

Or as I like to say: “Be who you want to be.”

Another overarching theme of the book, rather than a single section. This is a topic that is mentioned frequently. I counted over fifteen times in the book (all separate, but related, examples, thoughts, or ideas) that this topic was addressed. It seems this was something Brendon really wanted to hit home for us.

One of my favorites:

“Don’t you dare settle for anything other than the life you want to live. Look at your life. Look at every area. See what you need to stop doing and what you need to start, and do it while you still can, no matter how hard it is. Just keep learning and living.” (p.29)

There’s a huge difference between self-confidence and no desire for progression. I believe that the purpose of life is to learn, grow and progress. So isn’t there always something we can strive to be better in?

Don’t settle for a mediocre life because you’re afraid to put the work in to improve your life.

“You can be whoever you want to be, and you can do whatever you want to do. It’s time to believe [that] again.” (p.29)

If you could become whoever you wanted, who would that be? What does the “perfect” version of yourself look like? What steps can you take to get there?

Verdict & Next Steps

This book is five-stars for me, hands down. It was a fabulous read. It is pretty short, and only took me a couple days to get through. You can read it story-style (like a novel) or pen-in hand ready to take notes and mark your favorite passages. I started with the former, but decided there were far too many fabulous tidbits to miss, so I ended up grabbing my highlighter anyway.

So what now? I’d highly recommend purchasing the book and reading through it if you haven’t already. While you’re waiting for your copy to arrive, be sure to download the free printable: “Top 10 Favorite Quotes From the Book” below. There are so many more great things in the book I didn’t even address here!

Bonus Time!

If you purchase the book through my affiliate link (or if you already own it, you can purchase any other book through my link and receive the same bonus), send me a copy of your receipt and I’ll send you a printable workbook to accompany your reading. It walks you through many thought-provoking questions as you read the book, helping you digest and apply what you’re reading. (Reminder: My email is: connect@vibranceandbliss.com)

(Don’t forget to email me your receipt for your bonus workbook!)

When you look in the mirror, are you satisfied with who you are? What would you like to improve? In what areas would you like to see yourself progress?

Have you read the book? Enjoy one of the passages I shared? Let’s start a discussion! What are your thoughts? Tell me in the comments below!

Don’t forget to download your FREE Quotes printable below!

Top Inspirational Quotes!

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    How To: Add a Background to a PDF or Printable

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    Downloaded that perfect printable but think it’s just a tad boring? Did you know you can add a background to any PDF using Adobe Acrobat in less than 5 minutes? Watch below for a step-by-step tutorial.

    Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase using one of my links, I get a small compensation at no additional cost to you. See my full Disclosures page for more details. Thank you for supporting Vibrance & Bliss.

    Can’t view the video? Here’s each step as discussed in the video.

    STEP 1: FIND YOUR PRINTABLE

    Make sure you have the rights to modify the printable you’ve selected. If you aren’t sure, always err on the side of caution! Contact the owner of the printable if you don’t know. Most printables you’ve purchased will allow you to make this small adjustment for personal use only, but I’d always contact the seller to be sure. Note: All free B/W printables from my site allow for basic modification for personal use only. If you’d like to try out this tutorial on your own, you can find this printable and many others in the free resource library, which you can access after signing up for the email list.

    STEP 2: SELECT YOUR BACKGROUND

    Find your desired background image. There are many free & paid places to find digital paper and backgrounds. Spend some time finding a few patterns you really like. If you’re wondering where to find some great resources, I’ve got a whole list here.

    STEP 3: PLACE BACKGROUND ONTO PDF PRINTABLE

    Open up Adobe Acrobat Pro (not Reader. For this method, you must have a subscription to Adobe CC or have purchased Adobe Acrobat Pro separately) and click Edit PDF.

    Click on the white background to delete.

    Click “Add Image” on the ribbon on the top and find your desired background image.

    STEP 4: ADJUST BACKGROUND

    Click somewhere near the top left corner to place your background

    Click on the bottom right corner to adjust the size of the background image. Drag to one side and stretch down, or drag until the background reaches the bottom of the page.

    You can click and drag the image anywhere to adjust where it’s placed in comparison to the printable content. For example, if the pattern isn’t showing exactly what you want, you can adjust its placement to see different parts of the background.

    STEP 5: REORDER LAYERS

    Click off of the image to deselect all elements.

    Right-click on the background layer, hover over “Arrange” and click “Send to Back.”

    That’s it! You might want to repeat step 4 if the background isn’t placed exactly how you want to. If the colors I like aren’t showing up under the printable the way I like to, I’ll fiddle with it for just a second to get it the way I like it. Feel free play with it until it’s how you want it.

    Want to save the instructions for later?

    Download the printable version of the instructions here!

    GET THE PATTERNS!

    Love the patterns in this set? They can be purchased HERE.

    DOWNLOAD THE PRINTABLE!

    Don’t forget to download the free printable to try this out on your own! You’ll find it in the free resource library after signing up below!

    DIY Planner for Under $5

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    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

    Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase using one of my links, I get a small compensation at no additional cost to you. See my full Disclosures page for more details. Thank you for supporting Vibrance & Bliss.

    Trying to get organized but limited on funds? Have a million random pieces of paper and sticky notes flying everywhere and no system to process them? Did you know you can DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store? Create your first simple planner in 3 easy steps:

    1. COLLECT YOUR ITEMS:

    Gather what you already have and make a list of the essentials you need to get started. Don’t go crazy at first! Your primary goal is to create a basic system to keep your notes, responsibilities, and tasks organized to increase your productivity and efficiency. The Dollar Tree is a great place to shop for starter planner supplies. Until you know what kind of system will work for you, I don’t recommend putting a lot of money toward different planners. Here’s my pick of absolute essentials when setting up a planner system for the first time.

    BINDER


    First, you’ll need something to hold everything together. My recommendation for starting out is a simple 3-ring binder. You probably already have one of these laying around. It doesn’t have to be fancy- a simple one will do! I’d start with about 1-inch if you have one. Pocket folders on the inside covers would nice, but it’s not critical. I do always prefer hardcover since I like the option to use it as a writing surface if necessary. If you don’t have a binder, you can most likely find a super cheap one at the Dollar Tree or another discount store (Walmart/Target for instance.)

    PAGE-SIZE

    Page-size is a hot topic in the planner world, but I’d recommend starting with standard letter (8 1/2 x 11 inch) until you get more comfortable and know what you want. If you’re looking for a more portable/smaller size, half-letter (5.5 x 8.5 inch) is still pretty uncomplicated, but the starting supplies (binder, paper, pockets/tabs etc…) are non-standard and will be slightly more expensive to start you out. This is a great starting set in half-letter size (AKA “Mini Binder”) for only $10 and includes a binder (though not hard-back, unfortunately), a pocket, divider tabs with pockets and lined paper.

    POCKET FOLDER

    Especially if you don’t have pockets on the inside of your binder, I find this item to be basically essential. There’s nothing worse than having loose papers fly everywhere whenever you open your planner. I hold a myriad of random notes/scraps of paper that I want to keep with my planner until I can process or file them. Finding a cute pattern or color is also a great way to add some personality to your planner if you are using a plain binder or don’t have a view pocket on the front (or even if you do!)

    Your pocket folder will also serve as your “dashboard,” which is a fancy planner-term that just means a place to store stickies or other random notes for later processing.

    TABS

    Tab Dividers are great for separating & locating separate sections in your planner that you want to use for different purposes. I usually have sections for daily, weekly, and monthly schedules, personal, household, business, tasks, and general notes. You can purchase a cheap set of tabs for $1, but there are obviously many other variations that could cost a bit more.

    If you don’t want to purchase a set of tabs, you place a sticky note on any page to make your own tabs. I like these sticky tabs in 1-inch or 2-inch, but any sticky will do. (I love to make my own covers with a pretty art print or just colored paper/cardstock and place it in a clear page protector. You can then put your sticky tab on that if you wanted.)

    PAPER & PUNCH

    I always keep some blank paper in my planner for quick notes, lists, and ideas etc… I like to keep some lined sheets and some blank, and I know many people like grid paper as well (which I personally don’t do). I found a cute set of designed paper in a pack of 40-sheets at the Dollar Tree. (See photos below.)

    Odds are, you probably already have either a 3-hole punch somewhere, or at least a single hand-punch. If not, I know they sell a “single” punch at the Dollar Tree. Either way, I would definitely recommend having a hole puncher of some sort, as this is the easiest way to set up a practically-free planner (by using free printables).

    The beauty of using a standard binder is that if you’re really starting out and don’t have a punch, you can purchase a pre-punched pack of basic lined paper for $1, so there’s really no excuse to not have paper in your planner. If I haven’t said it enough, paper is essential for planning!

    PENS/PENCILS

    I could speak volumes on the different types, variations, colors, and brands of pens you can use for planning, but honestly just start with anything you already have. Of course I have my favorites, but if finding the “perfect” pen is stopping you from getting started, anything will work. When push comes to shove, a pen is really just a pen. (Though I will be the first to admit: not all pens are created equal. But that, my friends, is a topic for another day.)

    2. PUT IT TOGETHER:

    Now that you have all your materials ready, here’s comes the fun part!

    Place your folder & tabs inside the rings in the order you’ll find most useful. I like to have my folder in front, but do what works for you.

    Decide on the sections you want and label them. Some great starting sections are: daily, weekly, and monthly schedules, personal, household, business, tasks, and general notes. If you want, you could even get more specific: Meal planning, budget, cleaning schedule, kid’s schedules, personal study, goal planning and/or inspiration. Really the options are limitless here- just decide what you most want to keep track of and create a section. You can always adjust this later! Note: I’ll sometimes just use a sticky on the divider’s front if I’m unsure of how I want to categorize something.

    Punch & insert your paper. I recommend having a “notes” tab, but many planners just stick their blank paper in the front or the back and find that quite useful. It’s really up to you.

    3. INSERT YOUR FREEBIES:

    You could literally spend hours on Google or Pinterest searching for the perfect free printables to start out your planner, but if you want to keep it simple while starting out (which I definitely recommend you doing), I have a whole collection of freebies you can download and print right now.

    The pages/layouts I would recommend starting with are: (note: all these pages are available in my free printables library).

    YEAR AT A GLANCE
    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

     
    MONTHLY

    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

     
    WEEKLY

    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

     
    DAILY
    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

     
    BRAIN-DUMP

    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.

     
    NOTES – LINED & UNLINED
    DIY your own planner for less than $5 with a combination of things you probably already have, free printables, and a quick trip to a discount store.
    Don’t forget to Download the Printables in the Free Printables Library (below)!

    Decide on the printables you want and then print, punch & insert.

    Voila! You now have the perfect basic planner that fills all the requirements of a standard organizational system. The really amazing thing is that now, as your needs grow or change, you can update your planner until it’s working exactly the way you like. Remember – it’s easy to get caught up in the “fun” aspects of planning, but always make sure to keep functionality in mind. Anything will work as long as it helps you get & stay productive, organized, and using your time as efficiently as possible. Everything else is just icing on the cake.

    A NOTE ON PRODUCT LINKS

    *Note: the links to products on this page are to Amazon where I purchase most of my supplies from, and most of the items I link to are above $5. I stand with my belief that you can create a planner for under $5, but these products are going to be much higher quality than items you’ll find at the Dollar Tree, and as planners tend to receive a lot of “abuse” (read: “loving use”), I recommend investing in some quality supplies once you know what your needs are. Until then, while you’re still experimenting and building your “system”,  Dollar Tree supplies work just fine and will help you get started.

    Though I link to Amazon products to give you an idea of what to look for, you do not need to purchase the item from Amazon, as you can find almost all these things (or a version of them) at any Dollar Tree or discount store for a $1 or less. 

    NEXT STEPS:

    1. Download the Freebies! (Fill out the form below & you’ll get access info via email.)
    2. Join the Discussion: What are your absolute planner necessities? Leave a comment below!

    Self: Worth, Esteem, Confidence

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    Do you see yourself as your loved ones do? Do you have a sense of your innate worth and value? Do you recognize your unique talents and abilities?

    When you look in the mirror, what do you see? What kind of person looks back at you? Is she loved? Does she have value? Does she see it within herself, or does she wait for others to tell her? Does she believe it when they do?

    These are all questions, that if you were to answer honestly, would give you a pretty good picture of how you see yourself. This is called your Self-Image, and it’s the combination of three very important elements of your mental health: Your self-worth, self-esteem, and self-confidence.

    But why is all this so important?

    A healthy and positive perception of ourselves is absolutely critical to a successful life, because it plays not only into a positive mindset, but also mental and physical health. Not to mention how a strong self-image can bolster our resolve for future life difficulties.

    So how are you doing on this front? Today we’re going to talk a little about the differences between the three components of self-image, as well as a few things you can do to strengthen yourself in each area. And be sure to take the quiz at the end of this post to see where you stand!

    Self-worth

    This is perhaps the most simple of the three elements of self-image. It’s essentially just how you see yourself at the core. What you see when you look in the mirror, regardless of any events or life circumstances.

    Self-worth centers around the value believe you hold in the world. If you have a strong sense of self-worth, you know you have a purpose, even if you aren’t sure yet of the details. You’re one-of-a-kind and irreplaceable. You’re worthy of people’s time and efforts. You mean something to someone. 

    As you can see, these are all elements that other people cannot influence. They’re beliefs you hold for yourself, about yourself.

    The good (and bad, I suppose) part to consider here, is that for better or for worse, it’s also the most powerful of the three elements. It also influences them greatly. When you’re strong in this area, you feel as if you’re on top of the world. Unstoppable. Able to accomplish anything. But the opposite is true for the other side: if you feel that you don’t hold worth, you’re much more likely to get yourself in to trouble. To hurt those around you and make choices you normally wouldn’t. When you don’t have a strong sense of self-worth, you might also try to (subconsciously or not) sabotage potential opportunities for success.

    Your self-worth is largely built up during your childhood. Growing up, if you had loving parents, supportive teachers and loyal friends, you’re probably blessed with a fair amount of self-worth. People with strong ties to religion are also bolstered in this area. But if your childhood was less than ideal, or you don’t practice a specific religion, you might find yourself struggling to feel your innate worth.

    The good news is that no matter what your childhood looked like, self-worth is definitely something that you can build up yourself!

    Self-esteem

    Though self-worth is very internal (how you view your innnate spirit), your self-esteem can be very dependent on things that occur outside of yourself – like rejection, for example. Yes, you can, of course, control your reaction to every event, but even a small rejection can feel painful and harm the way you look at yourself. Build up enough of these little hurts, and it can drastically change the way we think, and feel, about yourself.

    One of the best ways to strengthen your self-esteem is to surround yourself with supportive people who care about you and are concerned with your welfare. People who appreciate your unique talents and skills, and where you have an opportunity to serve and contribute. Everyone likes to be liked and appreciated, and by surrounding yourself with positive people, you’re increasing your circle of support. 

    You can also play to your strengths. When you focus on the things you’re good at, you build up your self-esteem by recognizing you have valuable skills that can help contribute to your world. Try not to focus on the things you lack – be grateful for what you have and build on that.

    Self-confidence

    Self-confidence, on the other hand, deals more with how you feel you appear to others. When your self-confidence is high, you don’t worry about people looking at you badly. You say what you mean and you take action without hesitation. You don’t constantly worry about if so and so thinks you’re dressed wrong or if you’ve said the wrong thing. You’re focus driven and results oriented. You go after what you want, knowing the only thing stopping you, is you.

    Believe it or not, there are many people who have a ton of self-confidence, and little or no self-worth or self-esteem. These three terms are not interchangeable in the slightest, but developing and strengthening each will help you live vibrantly and blissfully. So how’s that for a positive life?

    How do you rate in these three elements? Take the quiz below to find out your Self-Worth, Self-Esteem & Self-Confidence health-meter!

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    Gratitude = Happiness

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    Regularly keeping a gratitude journal helps combat negative feelings and helps you focus on the positives in your life, even when life throws you challenges.

    I have struggled for most of my mature life with Depression – feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and shame that I’m not living up to my own expectations. There have been days where I’ve felt hopeless that things would get better for me and I’d never make it out of the darkness. But through it all, I’ve had some incredible blessings always there in the background, holding me up.

    When you’re in the abyss though, it’s hard to see those blessings. All you see is darkness. The light gets snuffed out by the negativity that is continually pressing down on you. So what can you do to help those glimmers of light shine through?

    For me, one of the only things that helped keep me afloat were the times I sat and pondered, and then recorded those blessings.

    Keeping a Gratitude Journal can help you feel happiness even in the darkest of times.

    Spending just a few minutes a day writing down your blessings can reap amazing rewards in your life! Scientific studies have proven that showing gratitude on a consistent basis makes people happier and healthier. One of the best ways to get into the habit of cultivating gratitude is by keeping a daily journal. Here’s a short list of how a gratitude journal can change your life for the better:

    Being grateful makes you happier.

    Being grateful for what you have, rather than pining for what you don’t, keeps you filled with feelings of positivity and hope. It crushes the negativity that is determined to keep you down. Studies have shown that gratitude can actually reduce negative thoughts and increase feelings of contentment, love, joy, and empathy towards others. As Tony Robbins said: “You can’t feel angry at the same time as you feel grateful.” When you fill yourself with feelings of gratitude, you are focused on the good things that already exist in your daily life, instead of wishing for the things that don’t.  And once you commit to writing them down each evening (or morning, if that’s better for you), you may even start looking for things to write down- even those little things throughout the day that you might otherwise miss. How much would your life improve if you only focused on the positive instead of negative!?

    Good Physical Health

    Negative energy (from thoughts and memories) causes resentment and stress, which manifests physically in your body. So when your mind only considers the bad, you are literally sending poison into your veins. Gratitude helps keep those negative thoughts at bay, by replacing them with positive ones. When you allow yourself to concentrate on the good in your life over the bad, you’re sending much-needed endorphins to your brain, which it needs in order to thrive.

    Increase Empathy for Others

    Thinking back through your day and remembering the good things others have done for you increases your positive thoughts toward them. It helps you understand more about their life and situation, as well as your response to how they interact with you. Let’s say that someone cuts in front of you on the freeway, but as they pass you they wave at you in apology. You could choose to be upset over their lack of tact and control, or grateful for your safety and try to think of why they might be in such a hurry? Maybe they’re rushing to the hospital to visit an injured family member? Or they could be late for a meeting that could mean a loss of their employment. There’s often a hundred possible reasons for a person’s actions- if you focus only on the bad possibilities you’re robbing yourself of the opportunity to see the best in people.

    Improve Relationships

    How much better would you feel about your sister if you listed three things every day that she’s done for you? When I’ve struggled in relationships with those around me, I’ve seen that relationships always seem to improve just from me changing my perception of how they act. People aren’t perfect, but as you focus your thoughts on their positive qualities and make a point to be grateful for the good things they do, you encourage more of the same in the future. It’s easy to find fault, but once you start showing appreciation for the people in your life, your relationships have room to grow.

    Better Rest

    How many times have you gone to bed thinking negative thoughts about your day, circumstances or interactions with others? How well did you sleep? For me, when I try to sleep with so much negativity I know I don’t sleep well, and I’m usually still upset in the morning, which can influence (or entirely ruin) my whole day.

    How much better would it be to go to bed with only positive thoughts? Writing in your gratitude journal can help with that! When you write in the evening (right before bed), you tend to get more rest because you have reflected on the positives of your day, inviting peace and calm to your mind before you sleep.

    Experience Less Stress

    Your body doesn’t know the difference between current and past “stress.” So when you think back to a stressful time in your life, you’re essentially reawakening all those negative feelings, including their emotional and physical toll on your body.

    By focusing on the positive, writing down the good things in your life, you avoid repeating that stress reaction in your body.

    Final Thoughts

    You can think of gratitude as being a mental and emotional muscle that you can build with daily exercise. If stuff goes wrong in life and your gratitude muscle is weak, you’ll struggle to find a silver lining in those storm clouds. But if you already have an excellent daily gratitude habit, then your gratitude muscle will be resilient and well-trained, meaning life’s challenges don’t completely knock you off course.

    All in all, keeping an ongoing gratitude journal benefits all levels of your health and well-being, and is a very worthwhile activity, having the capacity to change your mindset, and therefore also your whole life, from one that seems full of poverty and loss to that of abundance.

    Gratitude, when practiced daily, can train the mind to stay focused on positive thoughts, increasing feelings of happiness and contentment, while also strengthening you in preparation for the stressors of everyday life.

    Ready to gain the benefits of daily gratitude journaling? Download your printable and start putting it to use!

    GRAB YOUR FREEBIE!

     Don’t forget to download the free printable! You’ll find it in the free resource library. after signing up below!

    Deferring Tasks

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    Overwhelmed? Too many tasks? Sometimes it's prudent to redistribute your schedule to different days so you can focus on what needs to get done "right now."

    Have you ever taken a look at your task list and just felt overwhelmed with the sheer amount you had to get done? If you haven’t, I envy you. This happens to me all the time, and when it does, I find myself doing one simple thing to help me manage this ever-growing task list. It’s called a “Soon, Later, Someday” list, and it really helps me narrow down what I think I need to get done in day vs. what I actually need to get done.

    Grab a piece of paper or your planner, (or better yet, the FREE printable I made for you!) and let’s get to work organizing those tasks!

    Now!!

    Drop in all tasks you know you need to get done in the next day or two. Deadline coming up? Something due by a certain time? Time crunch? Put in everything here that you know you have to get done in the next couple days.

    Soon

    This list accounts for the remainder of the week. If you need it done 3-7 days from now, put it here. These tasks should be completed once all NOW! items are finished.

    Later

    This list can really encompass any time frame you’re comfortable with. I usually have it span 1-3 weeks away, or sometimes even a month. They’re lower priority tasks, or perhaps projects that take awhile to complete.

    Someday

    This lists holds all those projects that you want to do, but don’t currently have time for. Need a weekend but don’t know when you’ll get one? Put it here and you can work on the task/project as time is available.

    Put it to Work

    This strategy is super helpful for me when I have too many tasks for a simple list-based approach. It helps me narrow down my commitments and prioritize my time. Sometimes I am even able to remove some things from my list, if I realize it doesn’t help propel me forward toward my goals.

    Feeling overwhelmed? Download your printable and try putting it to use: I’m certain you’ll see clarity improved productivity.

    GRAB YOUR FREEBIE!

     Don’t forget to download the free printable! You’ll find it in the free resource library. after signing up below!

    NEXT STEPS:

    Enjoying this process of finding the best time to tackle your tasks? This is just one of the lessons I teach in my FREE course “Transform the Overwhelm: 7 Days to Peaceful Productivity”, which you can sign up for right now. Every day for a week you’ll receive detailed instructions, exercises, and support from me as you navigate your own list and work to transform those feelings of overwhelm into true productivity. Don’t miss out!

    What are Your *Most Important* Tasks

    by
    When you simply don't have time for everything on your list, decide which tasks hold the most value, and focus on just a few each day.

    Have you ever had a day where you worked yourself frazzled only to discover that by the end of the day you really didn’t accomplish much at all, and the things you should have done are still sitting there, staring you in the face?

    Buring Ourselves in Busy

    Getting things done during the day seems to be a constant struggle for most people I know. “I’m so busy!” or “There aren’t enough hours in the day!” are phrases that I hear so very often. And I get it! I say them myself definitely more often than I should.

    So why do we find ourselves “busy” so often? And what does that really mean? How much of what you’re doing every day actually propels you forward toward your goals? Because really, it’s not about how much you’re getting done… it’s about what you’re getting done, and if you’re accomplishing those things that are really going to help you get where you want to be.

    If you’re measuring your success based solely on the number of things you accomplish every day without thinking about the actual progress you’re making toward your goals, you might want to take a couple steps back, because you’re overworking yourself for no reason.

    Hopefully you understand the valuable nature of time. It’s a limited and oh-so-precious commodity, one that must be safeguarded and respected. And so often, we waste it away like it’s nothing.

    We will always hаvе things that will need to get dоnе, but the trick to staying productive is is figuring out what the right things are, and making sure we’re getting the biggest bang for our buck. Establishing your “Top 3” every day and focusing on these tasks first can help boost your productivity and help you get the most out of your limited time.

    If you’re tired of wasting it away and want to spend your time the most effective way possible, this is probably the best way I’ve found to help me feel like at the end of the day, I’ve been productive and gotten not just a bunch of things accomplished, but the right things. Sound good? Let’s go!

    Discovering your MIT

    Hеrе are the five ѕіmрlе ѕtерѕ to hеlр уоu establish your “Top 3” and tо gеt thе rіght things done:

    1. Brain Dump

    Get a piece of paper and write down all the things you think you need to do. If you’ve never done a brain dump, you can find more information about this process here. The idea here is that you’re going to get everything out of your head so you can process it all later on.

    2. Establish your Goals & Priorities

    If you haven’t done this in awhile, make sure you spend some time thinking about and writing down what you want to achieve in life, as well as what you value most. In order for you to make the best use of your time, you need to know what’s important to you and the direction you most want to head in.

    3. Organize

    Here you’re going to begin organizing your tasks based on importance, keeping in mind your goals & priorities. Remember: if it doesn’t align with the direction you’re trying to head in, it can possibly be deferred or dumped.

    When you simply don't have time for everything on your list, decide which tasks hold the most value, and focus on just a few each day.

    4. Schedule

    After you’ve narrowed down your list based on what you really need to do, now you can decide the order in which you need to do them. Do any of your tasks have a deadline? Which are the most “urgent” tasks, and which are just there for “someday?”

    5. Evaluate

    Fight the urge to be tempted away from this important step. Albert Einstein stated that the definition of Insanity is “doing something over and over again and expecting different results.” This is where Evaluation comes in.

    Periodically (I like to do this informally every evening or morning)  you need to take a step back and make sure that you’re on the right track. If you’re still not feeling productive at the end of the day, or you’re still feeling guilt over not completing everything on your list, are you really completing your Most Important Tasks? Are there other things that could be a better use of your time, even though they may not be as “fun” or externally rewarding? Or perhaps you need a mindset shift in understanding that you really can’t get every single thing done, but that it doesn’t make you a failure.

    Whatever it is that you need to change or do differently at this point, you have to do a periodic evaluation to discover what needs to change and take steps to make it different.

    GRAB YOUR FREEBIE!

     Don’t forget to download the free printable! You’ll find it in the free resource library. after signing up below!

    NEXT STEPS:

    I know that was a lot to digest in such a short time, but here’s the good news: if you like this idea of establishing and focusing on your 3 MITs, I go into it in further detail in my FREE course “Transform the Overwhelm: 7 Days to Peaceful Productivity”, which you can sign up for now. Every day for a week you’ll receive detailed instructions, exercises, and support from me as you navigate your own list and work to transform those feelings of overwhelm into true productivity.

    Goalsetting: Change Your Life, Not Your Circumstances

    by
    Don't set superficial goals- set goals that will stretch you & help you progress. Set goals that are going to change your behavior and your life.

    Do you find yourself making the same goals year after year, but not actually accomplishing them? How great would it be to actually see a little of your own personal version of success?

    I’ve made a lot of goals over the years, and I’ve learned that if you want to set yourself up for real, lasting success, you need to combine your regular goalsetting practices with behavior-based goalsetting.

    What is Behavior-Based Goal Setting?

    Think for a moment about how you currently set and track your goals. Are they based on your desire to achieve a specific result? Chances are, the answer is yes.

    Goals that are based purely on outcome are called results-based goals, and they usually involve a desire to change our living conditions: A promotion at work, spending less money, a newer car, cooking more healthy foods … all of these are results-based goals because they aim to change our circumstances.

    But there is a different type of goal that doesn’t focus on the result at all. Rather than focusing on WHAT we want to achieve, this goal is more concerned with changing our behaviors, which make achieving the results we want easier and far more sustainable. These are called behavior-based goals, and in making positive changes in our habits, (or behaviors), we are in essence creating stepping stones on our way to our ideal outcome.

    Don't set superficial goals- set goals that will stretch you & help you progress. Set goals that are going to change your behavior and your life.

    Positive & Lasting Improvement

    Results-based goals tend to focus on the things you do and the actions you take. Behavior-based, on the other hand, ask you to change how you think and act in certain circumstances. It’s more intrinsically motivating than outwardly rewarding- you have to look at how you’re acting and reacting to your world- not just what comes out of those actions.

    On the other hand, because behavior-based goals are so internally based, it makes it really difficult to measure and evaluate, especially while you’re still in the middle of progression. With result-based goals you can count the number of meals you make a week, and you can track the money you spend and if you achieved that desired promotion. “Success” is very black and white. This is why we tend to (more often than not) make results-based goals. After all, we like to see progress add up, don’t we?

    Many times, when we set goals, we focus on the negative- what we don’t want rather than what we do want. Behavior-based goals focus more on the behaviors we want to strengthen & grow, rather than the negative actions we want to remove. In strengthening the positive behaviors, we change the way we act- it goes beyond putting a band-aid on the situation that we’ll just have to fix again later.

    Let’s say you make a goal to lose 20 lbs. A few months later, you’ve worked hard enough to achieve that goal! (Go, you!) You’re finished now, right? Hard work over?

    If only! If you lost that weight using a fad diet or weight-loss product, as soon as you quit using those items, won’t the weight just return? Instead, you need to change your behavior- you need to create healthy habits like eating well and moving your body. You need to create systems in your life that you can live with, permanently, so you don’t fall back into your old ways.

    Results & Behaviors: Working Together

    Results-based goals are not inherently bad, and behavior-based goals aren’t necessarily “better”. They’re both necessary, but I think people tend to only be concerned with the goals that give them quick results. Common goalsetting practices don’t normally include both result & behavior-based goals, which when they work synergistically together, they go beyond the surface and really help you change your life in the most positive, productive way.

    When & How to Utilize Behavior-Based Goals

    If you’re having trouble meeting a results-based goal you’ve set for yourself before, think about the possibility of changing a habit or behavior in your life instead. For instance, if you set a behavior-based goal to increase your productivity but spend all morning on Facebook looking at cat videos, you’re not really going to accomplish much, are you?  That’s how behavior-based goals can help – your “results-based” goal is valid & honorable- you just need to figure out how to cut the Cat Video Distraction once and for all.

    It’s a lot simpler than you think to link your results-based goals with your more intrinsically motivated behavior-based goals.

    1. First just decide what you want to achieve, long-term. These are your traditional results-based goals that you’re probably already used to making.
    2. Then ask yourself: “What positive habits will I need to create in order ensure this goal is not only met, but also sustained?”

    Whatever habits you need to make or actions you need to take will become your behavior based goal. See how they work together?

    Examples of Behavior-Based Goals

    So what kind of goals can you set? Below are some examples of what behavior-based goals can look like, but just know that any goal that helps you look at your attitudes and internal motivations & behaviors will probably work. This list is certainly not exhaustive, but will help you get an idea.

    Don't set superficial goals- set goals that will stretch you & help you progress. Set goals that are going to change your behavior and your life.

    Hopefully you can see the beauty of combining behavior-based goals with results-based goals. By utilizing them both, your chances of achieving your desired result, and sustaining the positive changes you’ll begin seeing all throughout your life as a result, are much greater than by using just one of them alone.

    FINISHING THOUGHTS

    Whatever your goals, whether you aim to get more done, get out of debt, make new friends, or lead a healthier life, I hope you’ll try setting a few behavior-based goals of your own and I promise that by carefully developing them, it won’t be hard to see the benefits add up.

    Want to evaluate goals of your own? Download the FREE printable below to get started!

    GRAB YOUR FREEBIE!

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    Next Steps:

    Interested in more tips to become more productive, manage your time and organize your schedule? Sign up for my FREE course: “Transform the Overwhelm: 7 Days to Peaceful Productivity”. 

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